Speak Up

My story started when i was 13 years old and using Meth. I was a heavy user and was with men that were way to old for me. I first started my addiction in California and then move to Arizona. I was in and out of my addiction with the move to Arizona. I got pregnant at 18 and did not know that I was pregnant until 7 and a half months along. By that time it was to late to try to quit. I was still always around the drug because of my significant other. I ended up with a CPS case. In my addiction I was very good at hidding my drug use, even from CPS. I got through my case with out going to treatment, drug testing, and was still actively using. I was very lucky that my parents were there to take care of my son for a little while, but i moved with his father to another city in Arizona. My son was got getting what he needed from me or his father because we were still using. I continued the use of the drugs and everything else that comes with it. I then almost three years later found out i was pregnant again, but this time was different. When I found out i stopped using. I was able to stay clean the whole time I was pregnant, but was still in that enviornment with the drugs and bad people. I had my twins and when they were three months old i started using again. By this time we (me and my kids father) were back in the same city as before. I ended up getting a another CPS case. I again was trying to run from this case and moved back in with my parents. After a few weeks of living wiht my parents again my father found my pipe and baggies in my bathroom drawer and told me "Maybe CPS is right mybe your kids are not safe with you!" That was the night I quit the drugs July 3, 2008. After this happened it was not long before i made my kid's dad leave. I got into treatment at TERROS. I was there for 6 months in a outpatient group. While in this group i got my life together and started to become a "normal" person. I got my GED and found a job. I also met a man that was not in the drugs and he supported me through my recovery. I am now helpping people who went throught the same thing i went through, have my children with me, and have almost completed my Assoicates degree in college. My story is to give YOU hope that you can get through this. I had a very long history of the drug abuse and have been clean and sober for 4 year this July 3rd 2012. I use my story to help others see that there is a light at the end of this long dark tunnel and I believe in others until they can believe in themselfs. Just remeber that there is help out there for you, but you can only be helped if you are ready for the help. My hope is that just one person can get something form my story if not today at least some point in time. :)