Speak Up

My name is Paige , I am 15 & I am haunted by the monster . I was always the innocent , sweet , fun girl that all my friends parents loved . I had real friends . I had a family . Everything was great . Then things changed . My mom left my dad , & I left with her , along with one of my brothers . She became addicted to meth . Meth & also Heroin . She would lock herself in the bathroom & shoot-up & snort . We would bang on the door for hours begging her to come out . She didn't .She thought we didn't know . We did . She stopped caring , so I did too . When she stopped caring I tried to run to my dads , but all he did was beat me . He had other monsters of his own to deal with , so I went back to my mom . I started going out every night & partying . I would drink & smoke . I swore I never would do meth though . Then one night my bestfriend's boyfriend & his two friends came over . They had meth . I said I didn't want , but they said it was fun & I would regret it if I didn't . I remembered my mom was locked in the bathroom & it made me angry & sad all over again , I was sick of sadness & anger . So I did . I was amazing . . . I'd never been so happy in my life . . . Until I woke up the next day & my jaw was in horrible pain from grinding my teeth all night . I couldn't remember anything . My bestfriend told me that I had sex with her boyfriend & his friend . I was so ashamed . I told my bestfriend sorry & she only said she didn't really care , she was already high again . I felt disgusted with myself . I had trouble breathing & nothing tasted right . I was craving more . I did for about another month . . . Then I got taken away from my mother because Children Services was called on her . I now live in foster care . I stopped , but I still crave . Everyday . My mother is in Rehab & is getting better . I am a Lucky One . You can be too . Stop now . It's not worth it . Not even once .