Speak Up

I was seventeen when i first did meth. After that first time my life changed! I was only on it for about two years, i would spend about $200 a day every 5 days or so. But of course i didn't have the money so i would steal my mom's credit card and take out money. I knew it was wrong the whole time i was doing it, but you tend to not think clearly when your on it. All you can think about is how can i get more, or how can i make more.

When i was on it my life was spinning out of control. I was losing my friends, my relationship with my parents got worse and i was slowly thinking i was going to go crazy.No one really knew that i was doing meth everyday. And i thank God everyday for that. I watched my best friends and myself die. My friends got arrested, went to jail, went to rehab, but nothing effected us. We didn't care that this could and was killing us.

I finally decided i was going to get sober when my best friend had her baby and her baby daddy was in rehab. It wasn't easy, and still isn't. I've been sober for a little less than 6 months, and i think about it EVERY day! There's not one day that i wish that i could smoke a boat, or snort a line. When you know how to make it, it makes it even harder.

I don't have many friends, the friends i thought i had when i was on it are NOT in my life (except for a few). And i constantly have a voice in the back of my mind telling me to do it. I wonder constantly what my life would be like if i had never done it in the first place. Word of advice to people wanting to do it or that is on it: IT'S NOT WORTH IT! I lost everything in a matter of a year or so. And now until i'm dead, i will struggle with addiction to meth.