Speak Up

Hi my name is Victoria Gualdarama I would like to tell you my story about been on and off of Ice, best known as Crystal METH. I was 17 going on 18 when I first tried ice . I got married at the age of 17 and had my first child at 18. after having my daughter my husband ask me if I wanted to try batu and I ask him what was it so he came out with this pipe with this clear stuff on the bottom of the pipe . I ask him how do we do it and he showed me. I took my first hit and I didn't feel any thing so I said what does it do he said try again so I did . After a few hits I started to clean and cook like there was no tomorrow . I told him I like it and he said we can do it only once in awhile so I said ok .so we started to smoke it on weekends then we stared to smoke week days by the time you know it we was smoking it everyday. I had got in to a mean car accident but that made me want it more to take away the pain. by this time I was having my 2Nd child and I stopped, had my son. as soon as he was born it was on again and it was getting really bad cause all our money would go to the drugs . we started to have problems with family cause they know we was on the drug and it was a no no . we was renting from my morther in law and she kick us out so we had to find us a house that we could have a roof over our head for our children. by this time my husband started to deal the drug so money was coming in plus we was having help from the state . by this time our case from the car accident was almost done and we was going to have more money coming in and it was big money so the state cut us off and we had to live off of that money. it only lasted about a year and the money was all gone on drugs. By this time I was having my 3rd child so we had to move back home with inlaws. so we did by this time the state was called on us yes cps we was in our lives and yes I have lost my children . So I tried getting clean and I did for a few months and they give us back our kids as soon as they came back we started to deal and use drugs again. By this time I was having my 4th child and yes he was a drug baby so cps took them all away and I lost my children for good. we was dealing big time by this time. our house was like 7-11 always open we felt untouchable we was buying stolling goods, buy all kind of stuff and flipping it. by this time we was on drugs for about 20 year in to we got raded in 2004. that is when my world came down I was so lost cause now im sitting in jail asking my self what just happen my bail was 15,000 so here I go and call my family and ask them to get me out I will do anything. so my family do and I do good fro a little while then the next thing you know im right back partying with the husband so my family pull my bail back to jail I go this time I stayed in there for about a month in too. my husband get me out I go to court and they tell me no more using drugs. and do I listen? nope right after court im getting high. so they put me on probation. I have been in and out of jail so many times I thought that was my 2nd home then the judge told me that if I don't get help he is going to lock me up. so I tried to get help I go to a drug program that is for 2 years this is back in 2009 I stayed there for 22 months thinking I got this so they let me out and have not touch ice at all. I am now clean for 5 years and today I can say I love life cause I am divorce for about 3 years and have my family back in my life. I also have my 2 sons back in my life and I am getting married to a man that loves me for me and don't even do drugs at all. Today I can say my family trust me. I work for my brother and I also attend collage I am soon moving to Pataskala ohio to be with my husband and start a new and happy life.