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"The what if"

The pain of this addiction, the resentment, the "what if", the parts of me and "characteristics" that are lost and not yet to be found. The pain i've inflicted. The pain i've endured. The restless nights and self inflicted depression. The continuous relapse. The lies. The broken promises. The inabilities. The incarceration. The mirrors i look in.The unfulfilled. The empty bottles and packs of cigarrettes. The seperation. The wasted years. The retention. The plateau. The anhedonia. The memories. The person who was living this life, and warned me not to take that first hit.

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